Goodness! Jesus has given such indescribable goodness to me (I would love to say to “us” but each heart within our flock has their own words to put to their own journey so please hear me as “I and me” and know it can also be “you and them” <3).
I believe, upon our commitment and surrender to follow Jesus we are filled with His Holy Spirit therefore, we lack nothing. Nothing, no thing. We are promised His presence and this is a truth which cannot be misconstrued. In His love and kindness to me I can declare His presence alone is more than enough to live life, an abundant life.
This new 40 has brought to my spirit so much goodness I can hardly find words which describe the gift accurately. It is new and it is beyond me. This gift of more of Himself and His goodness has also brought an undoing level of humble confidence which is felt by others and described as precious and beautiful.
Friends, “it” isn’t me (although I know I am precious and beautiful and you are too)! What is seen and felt through me IS Jesus! HE is the ONE who, by lavishing us with His presence, His love… completely transforms us! Ohhhh, how I long for everyone to know Him in this way. He does not withhold Himself from us, He can’t. In His fullness He’s indwelling us. Jesus is determining and establishing all things to bring about for us, and His glory a greater understanding of Himself and our communion with Him in the all of our life is how the world will come to know Him.
By Him giving His all to us and not withholding anything from us, in turn, He invites us to withhold nothing, no thing, from Him. He desires our trust of Him and in Him, to completely saturate us and when this is true we are able to bring to Him, for Him, our all. In our willingness He is who forever will gently yet firmly hold us, hallelujah! He perfectly guides us, and fully frees us. There is never a demand from Him for our all and He certainly is not lording over us as a slave-driver but instead if His all (including His words of Himself and His words to us) is received by us — We. Are. Able. — to trust and bare our all to Him. Initially uncomfortable? You bet! Please hear me friend, when Jesus is our Lord and master we then are poised to finally and fully be made ! In our bareness He begins to dress us with His best. He does this both for us and for the ways He knows those who are wondering and wandering, lonely and despairing, need to see Him. As those dressed by Jesus we can know we are fully loved and completely seen by Him and living in this truth... we see Him all day, every day.
Jesus all day, every day is the only way I know how to live. Living my moments in the truth of Jesus being everything can cause me at times to possibly, maybe (I hope you are chuckling), be a bit intense, and/or, dare I say, even a little offensive to a fellow saint. This is of course not my hope, it is my truth though! A fear (since fear has been a method used by the god of this world to try to trick me into only living despairing and discontented days) I was aware of that lingered longer with me in my years past, was -- my children would not desire to know and love Jesus because my loving of and abandon to Him caused their days, as a part of our family, to be unique and slightly more challenging than what seemed others were experiencing. I celebrate I no longer cower to this lie for I fully trust Jesus to let His love and perfect presence be ever rich, ever real, and ever able to continue drawing our three to Him throughout their days.
Back to my dear fellow saints, I literally have asked Jesus at least 1 million times to “understand” how others who know and love Him can live their days not actually needing or expecting Him to be for them, their EVERYTHING. It has seemed to me so many others are able to keep to a “normal or common” life path with Him whereas ours has been everything but “normal or common.” This question isn’t me comparing our days as a family to someone else's, although in the beginning this was true and it definitely hindered me from receiving His freedom, my inquiry to Him instead, stems from His given desire within me to gently and genuinely relate to and encourage them. I am here as a fellow saint to help sustain them with words from Jesus but how does one do this from a place of not understanding? Understanding or not, I’ve seen of myself, if I didn’t grow in grace in this matter I would forever choose to isolate myself because being/feeling the odd-one-out-a-lot-of-the-time gets old to any heart. I know not to ask anymore, since after 1 million times I have finally let His answer take root --
“What’s it to you my dear beloved Karah, just stay on our path, this is where life is for you. Celebrate our uniqueness and trust ME to give to others exaclty what they need.”
Why, oh why do we let our gifts become our burdens!?! When I start to feel myself wanting to isolate because I’m living with a ‘third eye and speaking Karaese again,’ I know to ask Jesus for more from Himself so that I can stay engaged with the world and specifically encourage His saints. I so, so, so celebrate that I am learning to embrace my journey and remaining free while I trust Jesus to be equally and wonderfully creative with others. I look forward to more days of learning and spurring. Who’s game to join me? Let’s get together (yeah, yeah, yeah) (haha anyone remember that?!?)!!!
Thanks for entertaining my words. I hope through them it helps you understand me a little better but more importantly I hope it brings you to knowing and believing Jesus’s forever and never extinguished passion and pursuit for you and your all <3
ps What does this have to do with the “now 40?” you ask... goodness, goodness and more goodness cometh tomorrow...