He asks, "Kara, what do you want me to do for you?"
I wanted to trust completely that he was leading Ryan in this decision with his work change. I wanted to trust in how He was carrying me along physically for a full, beautiful, and ABLE recovery. I desire my whole flock to come to know Him intimately, and love Him really, truly, more than anything and everything. These things equal the abundant life HE promises, because where He is, there is LOVE. There is Joy. There is Peace. There is Patience. There is Kindness. There is Goodness. There is Gentleness. There is Faithfulness. There is Self-Control. These are the things I have penned for years, across hundreds of pages. He knows these things within my hearts hopes and prayers so… he yet nudged me along in penning specifics, silly specifics. Over those days following, I put ink to some of what I want <3
Here are a few, some of which have come to pass, others yet un-dated…
To be able to get Audrey a full-size guitar.
To have a roll-top desk.
To go to Israel.
To have some pretty panties.
To be able to pull our camper.
To be poured into by others, while I yet continue pouring out.
To be able to serve hot coffee when others come.
To go to Alaska.
To not neglect the gifts He has given me.
To meet and thank Louie Giglio.
To have continued peace and praise as I embrace my changed post-op body.
To create and have an annual February retreat honoring His faithfulness!
To have renewed homeschool HOPE.
To go to Hawaii, oh Hawaii, Hawaii, Hawaii!
To be debt-free.
To visit Catherine in Colorado.
To live well, where we are.
To continue serving with peace our Jerusalem, Judea, Samaria, and those from the ends of the earth.
The "list" in my journal is a few pages. It was a wonderful experience scribbling out my initial thoughts. At the end of my first heart and soul spilling I sat, looking at all that came forth, and giggled. I was tempted to chuckle or snicker, but the giggle was what came. For many reasons, and all for learning, much of my walk with Jesus has been down the street of “need vs. want.” I take the thoughts I’m having, I look at the circumstances we are ushered into and then scripturally dig deeper for His facts with regards to it all. Asking and journaling about “what can I be taught here about the physical, the relational, the spiritual etc.” In the end, I would not trade knowing and believing HE is all I need, as the truth! Had this truth not become real to me, I genuinely don’t know where or what I would be. These past few years, as we’ve intentionally sought to live a life fully abandoned to Him and His higher ways, we see how we must take the time to be saturated with His word. Praise God my identity is Hid in Him for if I were measured against those “assumed equations” in this American world, I/we, the Shultz Flock are "nothing" and "have nothing."
Would you believe ALL that I’ve shared above was not my original intent, lol. Sure you would, because you know me. In light of that, go ahead and nuke your now lukewarm tea and enjoy this... the continuation of Jesus surprising me in that which I want, from “Tampons to Trips.”